The Zebra Daily
by heptaPon
Summary: Zecora reports on her views on the events of the 100th episode. Naturally, she keeps her poetic style of narration while doing so. Originally published to fimfiction in 2015 as "In a Gadda da Zebra"


I'll tell you a tale of a day I once had,  
much like any other, with joy it was met.  
No longer my sight any mare or colt fled,  
yet still I know not just why I feel so sad.

I woke in the morning, the eastern sun grew,  
got up, brushed my teeth, as I usually do.  
A splash of cold water in my face and mane  
helped cleaning myself better than any rain.

I spent a while thinking about my last spell,  
including algae and mahogany smell.  
Which roamed my hut ever since yesterday night  
through certain mistakes; I did not plan that right.

A scowl at the thought I produced; turned around,  
and came to face with the shelf, on which I found  
some smaller containers, expected to hold  
my breakfast ingredients, here to behold.

Alas! I remembered how my last of foods  
got lately replaced by a few dirty roots.  
These were for a potion I wanted to brew.  
But gone were the cornflakes, and gone the late stew.

I realized now there was no point in trying  
to search for things that I'd been cooking or frying.  
My day filled with studies replaced by a frown,  
it seemed first I needed to head into town.

No five minutes later, my mane still a mess,  
I stepped out my home with a bit of distress.  
Three things to return here I needed, you see:  
Some cereal, oatmeal, milk, respectively.

The forest's sensations for my senses rushed,  
the smells, sounds, and visuals not scattered nor hushed.  
The birds had awoken, and chirped things to say,  
the critters below they had come out to play.

And only my stomach ignored this and rumbled,  
while still at my earring distracted I fumbled.  
It looked somewhat loose, which I needed to fix,  
so it won't mess up with the market square's mix.

Am I making sense? I hope you understand me.  
But should words seem puzzling, don't wait to amend me.

I now left the woods, stepping to the sun's light,  
bearing down on me with Celestia's might.  
Scooped over a hill and then quickly passed by  
the lovely green cottage of kind Fluttershy.

Judging from the silence she wasn't at home,  
and I asked myself then, just where might she roam?  
Most likely she went into town with another  
whoever that was, well, but why should I bother?

Deciding I would learn about it in time,  
I headed on further, not losing my rhyme.  
There was a small distance to cover from here  
up to the first buildings, my way was all clear.

But reaching the outskirts loud rumblings I heard  
like those from an earthquake, which sounded absurd.  
Whatever it was though, it couldn't mean well  
even in this town it was weird, I could tell.

Scratching my chin, deep in thought I then wondered,  
the latest days' news to remember I pondered  
through all of my mind back and forward, to say:  
Wasn't those two donkeys' wedding today?

Zecora you fool, I thought, now in light trot,  
united two souls this day, still you forgot.  
The one most important of days which they lived,  
and still you've not even yet cared for a gift.

But first I considered to learn of that roar,  
which surely was something I'd not heard before.  
And thus advanced further into the streets' net,  
though surely it soon would be to my regret.

Now, some minutes later the town's market square  
opened up before me, I looked around - there!  
I could not believe simply what I did see.  
A six-legged bear that looked like a huge bee.

The question of Fluttershy's whereabouts answered  
itself, seeing her and her friends how they ransacked  
the monstrous beast with, oh, so much at stake.  
And also there stood Pinkie serving them...cake?

It all had its upsides, the uproar they spurted  
for all of the market itself lay deserted.  
Now, I didn't mind, what I needed, I took,  
but left bits for payment; I am not a crook.

After a few minutes I finished my list,  
the gift for the wedding something I still missed.  
It's all so much simpler without all the fuss  
about every purchase and price to discuss.

Returning to where I had just now come from,  
I noticed the attack was still going on.  
The monster threw Rainbow Dash off, casually,  
as a mare named Sparkler looked up and asked 'Me?'

Matilda the donkey was whom she addressed,  
and needless to say they did both look distressed.  
The day of her wedding and now these bad news,  
I don't think I'd want to stand within her horseshoes.

I looked around now, saw the mailmare approach  
three ponies who probably could help her bunch.  
But instead of showing themselves more profound  
they just screamed 'The horror!' and fell to the ground.

I then arched an eyebrow across the whole scene  
to give it a skeptic look, or so I mean.  
It all seemed to strange, so sudden, unreal.  
About this I wasn't so sure how to feel.

It hardly did matter, I got what I came for  
without any knowledge on bugbears in store.  
There's no way help them, I thought with a frown  
it's never much fun just to let others down.

But get into danger instead of the former?  
I'd rather seek shelter at Sugarcube Corner,  
and get a quick snack, being already here  
although this time Pinkie was absent, I fear.

To my luck, however, the Cakes stayed inside  
preparing their gift for today's lucky bride.  
Which was a great cake, and three layers high  
and though not an expert, I found it divine.

They had nothing else on the menu today,  
safe for empty teacups and badges of hay.  
This cake, as it seemed, taken up all their time  
it left neither muffins nor some decent rhyme.

But smiling, I told them this won't make me grieve,  
then bade my goodbyes, and made ready to leave.  
But when I arrived at the door with good pace,  
it burst open, only to smash in my face.

I felt dizzy quickly and then staggered back,  
and spotted a cream-coated mare in my track.  
She took off her shades, looked round and repeated  
some earlier statement on bugbears defeated.

I still felt confused for a moment quite brief,  
but followed up quick with a sigh of relief.  
And trotted outside then, no evil expecting  
with only loud music that still felt distracting.

But where did it come from, did I ask myself  
got launched to the air, landed on some shelf.  
Now trapped on large speakers, I only could stare  
alongside me many a stallion and mare.

Our vehicle then hit a rock, as it tilted  
and back in the air thereby us catapulted.  
I sailed through a window of our town's hall,  
about at the apex, between rise and fall.

Despite expectations, I perfectly blended  
myself to a window's frame, and then descended  
onto an elevated box, where I landed  
on all of my four hooves at once, how splendid.

And contrary to just what I had expected;  
the others all crashing outside and neglected,  
each one ended up in the seats they selected  
like magic or of the like kept them protected.

My sanity hereby got put to the test  
however the wedding was standard at best.  
Two donkeys at last were united in love  
which does not fit my taste, and thus I shoved off.

Back into the forest, back home did I stroll,  
and somewhat exhausted, the day took it's toll.  
My saddlebags both were filled up to the top  
my brewing of potions no more at a stop.

This day I considered to be a success,  
although we might have had a bit of a mess.  
I cooked what was needed, no reason to fret,  
and still don't I know just why I feel so sad.


End file.
